National TV

Imma be on it. Like that grammar?
Yeah, whatever. The point is I'm going to be singing on NBC starting Dec 14th at 8pm.
A group of SoCal VoCal alumni and I got back together for this new competition show that NBC has put together for the holiday season.
It's a 4 episode special. 8 groups are competing for a cash prize and a Sony Record contract...
The winner will eventually be crowned by America's vote...so I expect some legit DPL styled support.
Get your text voting muscles in game shape. It's crunch time baby.

dpl

ps.
Those of you from Alaska who are trying to catch up, this is why I left the ship. bing bong.

Early Departure

So, I’m getting off this thing earlier than expected. Something came up that I just couldn’t say no to. Details on that to follow.
Anyway:
I’ll be landing in LA on Nov. 18th. Yup, in 2009.
Mark your calendars, tell your friends, alert the media.
dpl

'Rangin some 'Roo

Alright, check this out:
The other day, my buddy Jake and I found this amazing place outside of Perth, Australia. They said it was one of the few places that kangaroo hunting had been legalized. Turns out they have a population control problem. Anyway, led by a guide named Rosco, and equipped with nothing but a ridiculously awesome boomerang, we went out in search of kangaroos. We spent hours skulking around in the dessert tracking down the apparently elusive overpopulated hopping marsupials. Finally, we spotted one. Rosco said that it was a female. He said the looseness of the pouch was a dead give-away that she had recently carried a joey; pretty cool. He told us that this was the one. We followed her for a minute or two before Rosco gave me the thumbs-up. From a distance of about 25 meters, I launched my boomerang at the little sucker. For what seemed like an eternity, my boomerang sliced weightlessly through the air. My aim was true. BAM! GOT HER! My first throw had been a perfect one. The young mother kangaroo fell lifelessly onto the dessert floor beneath her. The three of us then bagged her up and brought her back to camp, where we skinned her and threw her on the ‘barbie. It turns out Kangaroo meat is really tasty…

Actually, none of that really happened. In reality, Jake and I just went to the supermarket and picked up some pre-packaged kangaroo steaks. Did you really think I would kill a roo?

gotcha
dpl

Pacific Crossing Season in Review

It’s been a month…but I have successfully crossed the largest geographic feature on the planet. Wanna know how it went? Oh YEAH!
Grades, Awards, Nonsense:

Ports of Call: A-
Big shout out to Hawaii on this one. Our nation’s newest state might be it’s coolest. There is so much to do on these Islands and I tried to do as many of them as possible; Surfing, Luaus, Volcanoes, Lava Tubes, Beaches, Cliffs, Waterfalls…the works. Oahu and Kauai take the cake, but I can dig Maui too. If we only stopped at Hawaii on the way ports of call brings down an A+. but then…
French Polynesia; the Big Overrated. Place was ridiculously expensive in terms of dollars and cents…and then to make it worse they dealt in terms of thousands (1,200 Francs for a hamburger…that’s 15 bucks to you and me.)
Then there was Bora Bora a.k.a. Snore-a Snore-a. You’d think a place like that has beaches everywhere. Nope. I took an hour long hike along the shore line; not 1 beach. Lame. French Polynesia; giving the middle of the pacific a bad rep.

Lindsay Hilly Award for Oldest Friend Visited
The namesake, Lindsay Hilly herself. Apparently my old next-door neighbor lives in Honolulu now. Who would have thought? We kicked it hard; drinks in Waimea bay, monopuas from 7-11, body surfing at Sandy Beach, dinner overlooking the city…hard.

Interesting Number: 5
Number of times I used the world’s largest public bathroom. Pretty self-explanatory.

The Darwin Award for Experience closest to Idiotic Death
While in Raiatea, in a stroke of absolute genius, I decided it would be a good idea to swim from the tiny island we were on to this other, even smaller island which was over a mile off shore. About three quarters of the way there, my leg started to cramp up a bit. It was at this moment that the stupidity of my situation truly sank in. I was by myself in the middle of the ocean, without a lifeline. Luckily, I am a true badass and finished up the swim. To get back to the main island, I hitched a ride holding on to the back of a kayak that some dude was paddling around. Yeah I’m smart. (Related story: to make matters worse, when I got to said smaller island, I got caught about 50yrds off shore on a really shallow and really sharp reef. It took me about 20 minutes to tiptoe those final 50 yards. At one point, I tried crawling; truly Pathetic.)

The “Buy Honda Stock” award for Best Tip
This one goes out to Jess Aman (My old next door neighbor’s boyfriend’s sister…yeah I know a bit Spaceballs-y.) Anyway, I was planning this hike up the Stairway to Heaven, which is an illegal hike up these government owned stairs in hololulu that Kawika told me about (Honorable mention). Unfortunately, I couldn’t convince a cab to drop me off and pick me up at the stairs entrance which was on the side of a high way on the way out of town. So I followed Jess’s suggestion and climbed Koko Head on the east side of the island to see the sunrise. Proof is in the pudding. Check out that picture up there. Obviously she deserves this prestigious award.

Passengers: A+
What made these passengers so special you ask? Well, its not that they are any younger than previous passengers (they aren’t). It’s also not because they are any less obese than the typical Alaskan customer (they aren’t). It’s also not because they aren’t American (they aren’t). What made the new demographic of guests on the Rhapsody of the Sea so awesome were their crazy Australian colloquialisms. These people have the most ridiculous slang (strine). I laugh at it daily. Taste: Chicken = Chook. “Mmm I’m hungry for a nice chook sandwich.” Bathroom = Dunny “Can you show me where the dunny is…I need to poop.” Afternoon = Arvo “I have stupid slang names for things that I like to use in the arvo.” And my personal favorite: Really? = Fair Dinkum “I have no idea how to create a sentence using this absurd Australian word. Fair Dinkum?” HAHAHA
Ok…maybe you had to be there.

The “Scott Tenorman Must Die” award for best conclusion
Me. Here it is:
While we spent far to many days at sea, lost sense of time, lost some of our sanity, and lost a few brain cells, the time we spent in port was legit. The Pacific Ocean has a lot to offer. Go there. I have. The end.

dpl

CABIN FEVER!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R6lY-EQrdA4

Well, it’s been four days at sea….
With two more to go…

I’VE GOT CABIN FEVER!!!!

The other day we reveled in our cabin fever and woke up and started our insane day with mimosas at 9:30. 15hours, 2 bottles of Champagne, 1 bottle of Vodka, 1 bottle of Gin and 1 bottle of Rum later…we still had cabin fever!

What was that? Did you hear something?
dpl

Pollywog

Somewhere along the way, there was a breakdown in communication. Apparently, Royal Caribbean was under the impression that I had never crossed the Equator before. False.
But because of this miscommunication, I had to participate in the other day’s Pollywog initiation ceremony. Evidently, a Pollywog is someone who has never sailed across this big imaginary line on the earth’s surface…odd.
Anyway, I was tied up, forced to “Kiss the Fish (!),” had eggs broken on me, and flour thrown all over me! It was an outrage.
Seriously, don’t they know I freaking HATE gluten??!!?
But really, it was a blast. I ended up rivaling with this brat 12 year old who thought it was cool to rub the fish all over my leg while I was tied up. Whatever, I got the last laugh when I stuck that fish halfway down his throat. MWAHAHAHA!!! KISS THE FISH SUCKA!! (Don’t worry. No 12 yr old children were injured during the making of this blog. Abused? Maybe.)

From the southern hemisphere,
dpl

Hallelujah

For the lord god omnipotent reigneth...
Hallelujah.

I'm out of Alaska and lovin' it.

Right now I'm about to have dinner overlooking Honolulu. Oh yeah. I'm having dinner with Lindsay Hilly. What up Westwind Drive?

Life is hard.
dpl